Grandtheftcow 0 Posted October 15, 2009 Similar in idea to the Stupid Question, Stupid Answer! thread. You are the Chief Engineer of the USS Pattywack. Your job is to use the knowledge gained from the silly science degree you eared at Starfleet Academy and years of experience as an Engineer to get your ship and crew out of implausible situations. Once you have found a solution to the problem create a new scenario for the next Engineer to tackle. Your first scenario is... A Ferengi ship is attempting to ram you in the hopes of collecting a large sum of insurance money. Unfortunately your Science Officers bee colony is running rampant in the engine systems making them non-functional. How will you prevent the collision and keep your insurance rates down? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Superanna 0 Posted October 15, 2009 How will you prevent the collision and keep your insurance rates down? Transport The bees to the Ferengi bridge of course, along with a compound to make them extra aggressive. While they are trying to keep the bees from stinging their earlobes, you will then have time to make repairs and escape- with your current insurance premiums maintained. We covered this scenario in basic training, where were you? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
enigma 521 Posted October 15, 2009 Transport the Ferengi crew into space! Then blast the ship into smithereenies! As for the bee colony, just gas them. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kirk's Ripped Shirt 0 Posted October 16, 2009 Hi I don't mean to offend but neither of you provided another question to work with though I like your solutions I have a next question: you have Klingons who threaten to blow up your pet ant farm but you are using the energy that would power the phaser banks and shields to replicate a giant jello mold instead. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
enigma 521 Posted October 16, 2009 Since the ant farm would be on my ship and in my quarters, I'd once again transport the Klingons into space. Scenario: You and the whole command crew are locked out from the main computer. You cannot move the ship, defend yourself or plainly put you and your crew have lost access to the ship. At the same time, a bunch of Neelix, Janeway and old Spock clones appear demanding that you and you alone have sex with them all at the same time or else you'll still be screwed over except the ship gets blown up. What do you do? P.S. at the same time your souffle is cooked and you need to get it before it goes crispy. Save the souffle! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Grandtheftcow 0 Posted October 17, 2009 A Ferengi ship is attempting to ram you in the hopes of collecting a large sum of insurance money. Unfortunately your Science Officers bee colony is running rampant in the engine systems making them non-functional. How will you prevent the collision and keep your insurance rates down? After some thought a highly visible and brightly coloured baby on board warning placed at the rear of the ship may prove to be a effective deterrent to Ferengi aggression. I have a next question: you have Klingons who threaten to blow up your pet ant farm but you are using the energy that would power the phaser banks and shields to replicate a giant jello mold instead. Use the main deflector dish to emit rainbow coloured charged particles to powder coat the Klingon vessel. With their sexuality and honor in question they will be forced to retreat in order to reassure each other of their pure heterosexuality. The day will be won and a bridge officer will gain character growth through the experience that only a giant jello mold could give. Scenario: You and the whole command crew are locked out from the main computer. You cannot move the ship' date=' defend yourself or plainly put you and your crew have lost access to the ship. At the same time, a bunch of Neelix, Janeway and old Spock clones appear demanding that you and you alone have sex with them all at the same time or else you'll still be screwed over except the ship gets blown up. What do you do? P.S. at the same time your souffle is cooked and you need to get it before it goes crispy. Save the souffle![/quote'] Transport the Neelix, Janeway and old Spock clones out into space since that doesn't require main computer access. A team will redshirts will have to be sent on a mission to save the souffle. It's possible they may not all survive. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
